I LOVE... No, I HATE Braxton Hicks

Amazingly, I’m still pregnant. Why am I the only one who’s surprised? Why can I think of NOTHING ELSE?!? I’m timing Braxton Hicks for crying out loud! I was NOT going to do that! Yesterday really got my hopes up. I had myself convinced the show was on the road. Smoochy and I spent a WONDERFUL weekend in Monterey, CA visiting our bestest friends Matt, Jen, and Baby Kaleigh. Originally we were just going for a day trip on Saturday. We palled around in the afternoon and then that evening they threw a UFC party to watch this crazy comeback match. It was such a good time. Jen had invited two other Mommies both with babies a year or under, so there were three darling little angels crawling around playing with each other. SO cute, and so very cool. All of us ladies got to chatting about babies and birth (an obviously hot topic for me.). I was fortunate to hear everyone’s birth story. It was fascinating to hear how different each story was. I heard everything from planned C-section due to a breach baby; to a planned natural birth with a labor that went on for DAYS and ended with Pitocin and an epidural; to a 100% natural birth with a midwife at a birthing center. It was of great benefit to me to be reminded that all the planning in the world can’t grantee you a perfectly (or even partially) executed birth plan.

Any way, Jacob had a few (seriously, just a few!) margaritas and so was not up for driving home, and I don’t trust my night driving ability at all right now, so we opted for a sleep over. I don’t know whether it had anything to do with the previous nights conversation, but I awoke Sunday having the most intense and constant Braxton Hicks. Still no pain, but defiantly long and strong. They continued through a delicious egg and bagel breakfast, all morning through good conversation, and on through my afternoon shower! After Kaleigh’s afternoon nap we decided to hit the Monterey Bay Aquarium. That was an incredible experience. They have great exhibits with the most fascinating animals. The giant kelp forest display, the Pacific Sunfish (aka Crazy Eyes), and the Octopus were definitely my favorites. But sure enough, walking around the Aquarium the contractions just kept coming. By the time we had stopped for a delicious dinner at a pasta/seafood restaurant, made it back to Matt & Jen’s house, and watched an hour of Law and Order the contractions were getting downright uncomfortable. YEA! Then I got nauseous…then the diarrhea hit (sorry, TMI I’m sure). But I was so excited. I couldn’t help thinking, “Here we go!”

Nope. I had hoped to go to bed last night and wake up having no-joke real-deal contractions. But instead I woke up at 4 AM starving for a bowl of cereal. Well, to be exact I woke up at midnight, at 2:22, THEN at 4:00. Anyway, here it is Monday afternoon, I am not in labor, the Braxton Hicks have slowed way down, and now I’m kind of disappointed. Don’t get me wrong, practice labor is good. I’m sure yesterday served to get Sonny into a better position and maybe even effaced and dilated me a little. Hopefully things will continue like this so that once things really get started some of the work is already done. Who knows? What I do know is I have to get myself distracted otherwise I am going to drive myself up a wall. I need a good engaging project, and laundry just isn’t fitting the bill. Well, I’m sure all of you out there are on the edge of your seat, waiting to hear every detail of my pre-labor symptoms. Don’t worry! I won’t let you down! Be sure to tune in tomorrow to hear me ponder, “Was THAT my mucus plug?” “That one kinda’ hurt, was THAT a real contraction?” and much more!

38 Weeks Down! 2 To Go?

OOooo-WEeee! Today marks the beginning of our 38 week of pregnancy. My body isn’t quite sure what to do with itself. The last two days I have had tons of energy, tons of Braxton Hicks contractions, and I have felt like there’s a bowling ball in my pelvis. I could have sworn that we were gearing up for the Big Push. Not that labor was going to begin the next day or anything, but certainly around the corner. Today I have a whole different feeling. I am lethargic, ready for ANOTHER nap (it isn’t noon yet) and I haven’t felt the slightest tweak from my uterus. Oh well… How much longer can it be though? Even if Sonny’s a week late he’ll still be here in less than a month! It’s amazing how your body just KNOWS when to have the baby, how your body and the baby communicate with each other the perfect moment for labor to begin. It’s also amazing how after nine patient months, I am NOW obsessing over the question of WHEN!


I am sure I am not alone. There have got to be millions of pregnant women right now looking at the calendar and wondering. Despite my best intentions of not getting overly anxious in the final weeks, here I am. I told myself all along I was going to stay busy and not think about how close it was the last month so that I wouldn’t be counting minuets before the birth. I would HATE to mistake Braxton Hicks for actually labor just to get my hopes dashed when the contractions stop.


I know, I KNOW! I should be enjoying these last few precious weeks of pregnancy. I should relish the last few times of feeling my baby kick and move within me. Soon there will be feedings, and diapers, and sleepless nights to contend with. Hubby and I need to go to the movies and go out to dinner a couple more times while we can. Heck, I guess the baby really CAN’T come until after I’ve gotten to see X-Men III!!! Thankfully that movie comes out Friday! Of course I won’t brave the theaters to see it until AFTER the crowds have gone. So anyway, that’s where I am at. I’m really not anxious to not be pregnant anymore. Pregnancy has been wonderful, and I know I will miss it. BUT I AM DYING TO MEET MY SON!!!

More Belly

Can you believe there’s a BABY in there? OK, that’s probably pretty easy to believe considering my girth. I thought I’d post another picture because though yesterday’s shots were fun they really didn’t do the belly justice. Thanks for all your fun comments and guesses yesterday! Keep ‘em coming! I laughed hard at the correlation between Jacob and a Civil War general. That is totally the look! As for any plans to shave, I don’t really think there are any. I don’t even think he’s got any plans to trim it! However, I’m sure if Smoochy finds he makes the baby cry when he gives him kisses we might actually have the butt-chin back! I don’t know, my Dad had a beard much like that when I was born, and I’m sure he gave me tons of kisses! Maybe instead of making bets about when the baby will be born we should place bets on when Jacob will get sick of the beard!

Belly and the Beard

Here you go folks, Mr. & Mrs. Smoochy at 37 weeks pregnant! The countdown to baby is officially under way. Now that Daddy Jacob is home labor can start any time. Sonny's due date is June 8th, but lets take bets! Don't all first time parents do this? Anyway, whoever guesses the closest date without going over (totally Price is Right style!) will win A NEW CAR! Noooo, will win... I don't know what you'll win but I think of something cool. OK, I'll guess first. May 31st! Here's to wishful thinking, right? OK folks, PLACE YOUR BETS!

A Long Over Due Post

Some things never change. In the “old days” (last year) I would anxiously wait and wait and WAIT for Jacob to return from deployment. Finally the big day would come. The USS Wyoming would pull in to port, and I would speed off in the CUTEST of outfits to pick up my sweetie from the base. After a blissfully couple hours of reuniting and sharing stories, kisses, and caresses he would be out like a light to sleep off the exhaustion of 24 to 48 hours of wakeful exertion spent bringing the submarine home.


Things are different now. A three week business trip to Korea is vastly different than a three month deployment “somewhere in the Atlantic.” Oddly enough however, the out come is very similar. After waiting, waiting, and waiting my hubby has at last been returned to me. And just like the days of old, after a wonderful time spent chatting, and kissing, and, cuddling he PASSED THE F#$% OUT. In fact, despite his best efforts to beat jetlag and readjust to the left coast time, we spent the weekend passing like ships in the night as his body tried to sort out when to be tired.


I thought for sure he had it figured out last night when after 6pm Mass he came home and immediately went to bed. He could hardly keep his bloodshot eyes open through the service and I thought for sure he’d be down 12 hours EASY. Unfortunately for him however, he was up at 1am, cooking himself a pork chop and getting some work done on his laptop. He showered and went in to the office at 6AM, after being up the whole time. I expect him home for an early supper and another 7pm bed time. Sheesh.


I suppose this is all great training for the odd sleep schedules the baby’s entrance into our lives will cause. Bring it on Baby! Right now at least we aren’t sleep deprived, we just aren’t sleeping TOGETHER!

Homebirth Check List

Wednesday night…7:00 on the West Coast, all is well with the world. For the most part anyway. Today I finished up shopping for the last few necessities for the baby and for the homebirth. It was fun, but all the walking was a little taxing…I found out yesterday I have an umbilical hernia (more on that in a bit). But the good news is we are set for Sonny!





Disposable Underpads: CHECK!


Protective Covering for Mattress (vinyl table cloths): CHECK!


Hospital Sized Sanitary Napkins (complete with stylish and comfortable belt): CHECK!

Large Bowl for Placenta (a mixing bowl will be fine, right?): CHECK!

Receiving Blankets: CHECK!


Funny, I never thought I’d have such a good time shopping for sanitary napkins! I’m going to set up a little “Homebirth Station” on our coffee table with all of our supplies. That way everything is easily accessible when the big moment comes. I don’t know about your husband, but mine can’t find anything without my direction. I swear he wouldn’t find his sock drawer without me to point it out each morning. The last thing I want in labor is, “Honey, where do we keep the thermometer? Smoochy, do you know where the large bowl for the placenta is?” AAAH!


Most of the items on the homebirth list we already had: rubbing alcohol, hydrogen peroxide (gets blood out of everything!), cotton balls, etc. So my shopping list wasn’t too long. Receiving blankets threw my hubby off. I actually purchased them about a month ago. When I was telling Smoochy about it he innocently asked, “Won’t they have those at the hospital?” Hmmm…they DO provide those at the hospital, but since we won’t be going there (God willing) I don’t think they’ll be too keen on providing us with blankets.


We both chuckled at his little slip. But it makes a good point; there are several things the hospital just provides that at a homebirth you have to step up to the plate on. The first thing that comes to my mind is the friendly orderly who changes the sheets and cleans up the afterbirth! Oh well, I am gladly willing to buy my own receiving blankets if it means the piece of mind of knowing my baby won’t have to have a mandatory and unnecessary two hour OBSERVATION period in the nursery. How can having to buy your own underpads possibly compare with having to deal with some episiotomy-happy, clock-watching, pitocin-ready OB propping your legs in stirrups and telling you to PUSH!? OK, maybe I’m being a touch melodramatic, but the bottom line is that I am proud that it’s my hubby and I who are taking responsibility for our birth.


As for the umbilical hernia; I’m fine. I had been noticing some extreme tenderness around my naval for days. But, yesterday morning it hurt and was turning a little black and blue. My midwife (who absolutely rules) fit me in to her day and so last minuet she checked me out. Diagnosis: hernia. It’s not a big deal, nor is it uncommon. I just have to take it easy. Honesty, I have been very careless when it comes to lifting heavy things and maybe being a TINY BIT competitive in yoga class. I can’t help it! I’m a show off! All I can say is lesson learned. I bought bulk dog food, landry detergent, and fabric softener at Costco today, and I promise all of it will stay in the trunk of the car until Jacob gets home and unloads it! I swear!

Houdini

This morning my husband gave me some grief about not posting regularly in the blog. Sorry dear readers, I just haven’t had much of interest to write about. With Jacob in Seoul my days have become ruled by routine, as it’s been all I can do to get through each one. Not exactly interesting stuff. Anyway, when I protested that I had no good material for a blog entry he prompted me, “Make something up, you're good at that.” Well luckily for all of us I don’t have to. Yesterday turned out to be pretty interesting.


My good friend Jen and her 10 month old baby, Kaleigh came for a visit yesterday. We had a lovely afternoon complete with a Ladies Lunch at Panera (my favorite!) and then a trip to the mall. We had a delightful time. As wonderful as that was it’s not the interesting part really…unless of course you get a rush out of shopping for nursing bras and baby portraits at Sears like we do!


What’s interesting is that once we returned to my home we opened the door to find Jack and Scooter tails a-wagging happy to welcome us home. Again, nothing out of the ordinary, except Scooter was missing his halter, which I figured he had just finagled his way out of some how. I checked the house and didn’t see it. A little strange, I know he had it on when I left. Then I noticed my answering machine blinking so I checked it. The first message was:


“Hi, my name is Georgia and I live here in Niles. I found a blue halter in front of the post office and thought I’d call the number on the tag. Looks like your little dog Scooter is out and about.”


WEIRD. But, Scooter was obviously home safe and sound, sitting at my feet.


The NEXT message played:


Hi, my name is Joann, and I live at 1234 Any St. (just down the street from us) and I have these lovely two dogs in my kitchen. Jack the lab and a little Chihuahua without a collar. Please call me as soon as you can. They are playing nice with my dog right now, but I’d really like to get them home.”


Oh my gosh, those little Houdinis! How the heck did they get out, and better yet, how the heck did they get back in!?!?!?! I KNOW I locked the kitchen door when I left…I doubled back for my keys to do so!!!!!


Well, I called and spoke with the good Samaritan Joann, who was a very kind lady. She had walked down our street looking for someone who knew Jack and Scooter. Thankfully she ran into our landlady who recognized the pups, let them back into our cottage, and locked up for me. I had TWO wonderful women looking out for me that day.


When I spoke with the landlady to thank her she said she discovered our front door wide open when she went to put the pups up. I couldn’t believe it! I checked to make sure nothing was missig (not that we have much to take) and all checked out. The only conclusion I can draw is that Jack somehow figured out how to open the front door (which must have been unlocked) and the gate in our yard. What I find as amazing as their escape is the fact that the two of them stayed together. How cute is that? Can’t you just see Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum wandering about on a mad adventure together? Well, those are my idiot circus dogs, folks.

I Love My Midwife

I had a check up today with my midwife. It was great as usual. We started at two o’clock and two and a half hours later the visit was over. What OB/GYN is going to spend that kind of time talking with a patient? The woman is AMAZING. After thirty years of practice she has seen and dealt every kind of complication and situation. She was one of the re-innovators of midwifery in her state. She worked outside the system before traditional midwifery was legal, and then fought to make it legal and available to women. Not only did she take up the cause of midwifery in the USA, but she also helped traditional midwives in Guatemala organize, protect their art, and create a birth center. I really look up to her. While chatting with her husband today he mentioned that she has NEVER been sued by a client. I wonder how many other healthcare providers can make that claim? I doubt very many. Not that every birth she attended had a perfect outcome, because that is impossible after thousands of births. Sometimes things go wrong that are outside ANYONE’S control. But what is impressive is that even her clients who had to face unhappy outcomes never blamed her or lost their belief that she had done everything in her power to bring their baby into this world safely. Well, I completely trust her.


The tone of our visit today was different than before. Previously, our meetings were more focused on over-all health issues, but today we started getting down to the nitty-gritty. I was given the list of supplies for the homebirth (a much shorter list than I expected!) and she urged me to get everything in order because once Jacob gets home from Korea it could happen at any time! COULD, but probably won’t. Feeling my belly today she said that Sonny didn’t have a "ready feel" about him yet. She told me she could usually tell by touch and intuition when a birth was actually getting close. Sonny still has plenty of room to move and is actually a little small. She estimated he is currently about six pounds. This blew me a way because I would have guessed that he was going to be HUGE! If he goes to term and gains half a pound a week he’ll be up to eight pounds at birth, but I would have guessed he would be a 9 or even 10 pounder! Oh well, the proof is in the pudding, only delivery will tell. Thank God he’s head down and it isn’t likely that he’ll flip!


I guess the lesson of the day is that there is no telling with birth. This baby could make his entrance in one week, three weeks, or six weeks and be perfectly healthy at any of those times. Statistically speaking first time Moms tend to run late, but I bet most of them anticipate going early. Part of me (despite all rationality) actually thinks this baby will be born in May…and he’s not due till June 8th! At least my husband will be home soon. After three weeks of separation we may not WANT the baby to come right away so that we can enjoy each other’s company to the fullest extent. (Sorry Dad!) But you know what they say; the quickest way to get them out is the same way they got there in the first place!

The Blog Meme

I used to think I knew what a meme was until I entered the blogsphere. Of course the blog meme fits very nicely with the original definition of the word. So, really it’s not a separate definition, just a modern application. I digress, my life is a little on the not so exciting side right now, so for lack of a better post I give you this. Kinda’ amusing I thought. I lifted the blog meme from Toddled Dredge (a very fun and thoughtful blog I just recently bookmarked) who snagged it from elsewhere herself. Ahh the promulgation of a meme, FACINATING! ;-)


Procrastination Meme

I am 36 weeks pregnant tomorrow.
I want Seoul, South Korea to be a half hour drive from here.
I wish I could go meet my sister for lunch.
I hate unloading the dishwasher so much so that when I am on my own I will use all of the clean dishes out of the dishwasher, until the sink is full of them, THEN reload.
I love making photo albums, George Strait, and Pure Country (watched it last night)
I miss being able to see and trim my little girl parts (sorry Dad)
I fear prolapsed cord and thick meconium in the amniotic fluid.
I hear Korean food is pretty slimy and gross.
I wonder what it’s REALLY like to care for an infant 24/7.
I regret never going to Savannah for St. Patty’s day or South Beach in Miami when I lived close.
I am not a kid anymore, not even a little bit.
I dance in my living room whenever itunes shuffles to a song with a snappy happy beat.
I sing in the car, in the shower, on walks, while I cook, and horribly off tune.
I cry more easily now than ever; it makes my eyes turn turquoise.
I am not always able to separate fact from fantasy thanks to my hyperactive imagination.
I make with my hands blueberry muffins from scratch most recently. (they were pretty freaking good too!)
I write in my blog to help me feel connected to all my far flung friends and family, and other moms in general.
I confuse boredom for hunger.
I need to limit my internet time.
I should make a day trip to San Francisco, even if it’s by myself.
I start thinking about what to eat for breakfast before I get out of bed.
I finish reading one book and immediately start in on another.

Dear Sonny,

Hello Baby! How’s life in the womb treating you? Things are going alright out here in the wide world. Your Daddy and I are super excited to meet you. It should be pretty soon now. Today is May 8th and you are due June 8th! I know you haven’t got any concept of time yet, but let me be the first to tell you, that a month isn’t very long! Well the month will pass quickly for every one else I know, but it might drag a little bit for me. I’m very preoccupied with your imminent birth.


In fact, I was hoping to go over a few things with you before you make your grand entrance. First off, let me assure you that I am completely prepared to follow your lead. You can come when ever your new little heart desires. 37 weeks, 40 weeks, even 42 weeks wouldn’t be so bad! I’ve noticed you are definitely heading south towards the exit. Today while I was walking the dogs I felt so much pressure in my pelvis I thought I might pop. Plus you and I have both felt all the Braxton Hicks contractions lately. Wow, don’t we share a busy uterus? Here’s the thing, I was just thinking it would be best if you waited until your Dad got home to be born. He would be so sad if you showed up and he wasn’t here to be the first to greet you! So just hang in there a little while longer, OK?


Another little pointer, I was poking and prodding my belly today and I was a little concerned that you might be sunny-side up. I couldn’t feel the nice round curve of your back, but instead I felt a whole assortment of little baby arms and legs. If the back of your head is still against my spine when labor starts it’s going to cause your Mommy a lot of pain and it’s going to take you a lot longer to get out. Buddy, that would suck for both of us! I want you to meditate on how comfy it is in the anterior position, and I will spend some time on my hands and knees doing cat/cow stretches to get you moving. Deal?


Baby, mostly I just want you to know how much everyone out here loves you already…especially your Daddy and me!!! You have tons of grandparents, aunts, uncles, and a whole bunch of other people who can’t wait to meet you and give you lots of kisses. Kisses are great; you’re going to love them! We’re all set out here for you. You’ve got tons of cute and comfy little clothes, soft blankets, and a very special bassinet (Your Grandpa W. made it for your Daddy when he was a baby!) all set and ready to go. There are so many cool things out here in the world you are just going to love. Please come soon and safely, Sonny! I love you so much, and I think about you all day long.

Love, Your Mom

35 Weeks Pregnant

Oh WOW! I am officially 35 weeks pregnant! Time is flying by! I’m excited for the baby to be here, but at the same time I am in no rush for the pregnancy to be over. I have loved every second of this incredible and miraculous time. I love my big huge belly and I am going to miss it when it’s gone. I love feeling Sonny move and stretch inside me, and I love the peace and comfort of knowing he is perfectly safe and I have the power to protect him from most everything. This will be the safest he ever is! As soon has he joins us in the world there will be a host of dangers, pitfalls, and heartbreaks I will want to save him from, but just won’t be able to. My bestest friend Angie, reminds me that this is life, and that he will need to go through all those things…but let me tell you I have a new respect for worry-wart mothers every where.


It’s 6:00am and I have been up for hours. I’ve been having trouble sleeping through the night lately. I read online this morning that 78% of pregnant ladies experience insomnia. Yuck, I’m glad I’m not alone, but I’d be happier if all 78% of us could get some sleep. It’s a bunch of things keeping me up. Firstly, it’s nearly impossible for a former back sleeper like me to get comfortable, no matter how many pillows I employ. Then, even if I do finally get to sleep I can count on being awoken at least four or five times a night with the urge to pee, crazy dreams, or Braxton Hicks contractions. More likely than not, I am awoken by all three at once. When Jacob is home I crawl back to bed after my bathroom break and his steady breathing (snoring) and reassuring presence helps me fall back a sleep. But with him in Korea, it’s been rough. 3:30am rolls around and I just KNOW that it’s 7:30pm in Seoul and I start wondering how he’s doing; whether he’s been bamboozled into eating dog, or contracted the Bird-Flu yet. CRAP! Before I know it, it’s 5:00am and I am wide awake. *Sigh* At, least it’s good practice for the nights to come.


I’ve got it all figured out. God makes pregnant women insomniacs so we’ll be used to getting up with the baby, constipated so we can practice pushing until out blood vessels burst, and hormonal so we’ll get a taste of how crazy our children will make us.

The Top Ten Ways Smoochy Shows Me His Love

10) Hangs out in the bathroom to chat with me when I’m showering.

9) Laughs at/with me instead of reprimanding me when I make silly mistakes.

8) Sometimes he helps clean the kitchen after a meal, even when he’s worked all day.

7) Calls my folks just to say “Hi”, without me prompting him to.

6) Has a huge bear hug ready for me as soon as he walks in the door, even if he’s had a crummy day.

5) Emails me from Tokyo airport after a LONG flight just to let me know he loves me and is thinking of me.

4) Supports all my decisions and dreams, (Like Homebirth!)

3) Whispers “good night” or “I love you” before we drift asleep

2) Listens to me and my advice even when he won’t listen to anyone else.

1) MAKES ME BANANA PANCAKES ON SUNDAY MORNINGS!!!!

I am a very lucky woman!

Notice Any Similarities?

Is Jacob secretly a Super-Villain hell bent on world domination? Is he a spurned fan, a boy gone rotten and eaten up with plots to exterminate of all the Supers? Nothing so diabolical, he is merely another tragic victim of bed-head. Oh Captain Comb! Where are you when we need you? Come to the rescue Super Gel! Actually I think he looks kinda’ cute like this! I have to wonder though, what are all the clean shaven, short statured Koreans going to think of my great big hairy mammoth of a hubby! He He He, more on that to come!